Sunday, November 21, 2010

::Sweet Actualities - The Curse of The Gray Area::

Some people would rather remain in the gray area of mediocrity than commit to greatness...

Why do we set limitations on ourselves, what we can do, and our relationships? I guess more recently, I have been setting limitations on how I can grow relationship wise...

From a young woman's standpoint, we at times accept whatever we are given. Therefore denying our own worth and our inevitable advancement as young women. More specifically, we put ourselves in these "Gray Areas" of relationships. Not defining what or who we are to certain people. In turn, this allows people to treat us however they feel... And we have no right to complain because we let them. We give others permission to mistreat us.

Is it a lack of confidence in ourselves? Morals and values? Why is it that we take what we are given instead of setting a standard and having others rise to the occassion of our respect and greatness?

Recently, I had to take a stand. I refuse to accept less than what I deserve. There are things that I want for my life that can not be changed by settling for the beliefs and needs of others.

I choose to be selfish from now on... I may have to let some people go and readjust relationships but that's what it takes to make a difference in my life and the lives of others.

We have to take the initiative to change and break the stereotypes and "generational curses" that we have made for ourselves. No one will respect us as young, successful women if we don't respect ourselves first. Of course that seems so cliche but it's real rap.

Letting someone have relationship benefits but not the commitment is not love. Nor is it acceptable.

Conforming to the belifs, ideals and opinions of others to make them feel comfortable and deny ourselves is not love. Nor is it acceptable.

Allowing somene to continually treat you in a regard that is less than what you deserve is not love. Nor is it acceptable.

Staying in a personal or professional situation for monetary gain, benefit, or overall advancement does not make us any better than the next person trying to "get over". Nor is it acceptable.

We have been complacent long enough. Are we really satisfied with these self-induced "Gray Areas"? I'll say that I am not happy with it. When you're not happy about something, what do you do? Make a change.

I encourage you to do the same.

And to those young men who may possibly read my blog, Do yourselves a favor by rising to the occassion. You get back what you put out. If you continue pass over the good ones because you've become accustomed to the curse of the gray area, you have no one to blame but yourself when you end up in an "unsavory situation".

Get to know young ladies for who they are, their trophies of emotional war, and the goals that she holds on to for dear life. We as young women are more than our bodies. We are more than being objects of your fickle lust and desires and sometimely emotion.

There's nothing wrong with courting and dating in the proper realm for the pursuit of a woman's love and affection. If it is to be won easily, you've lost the battle for yourself in the long run...

And on that note, I advise and support change. Save yourself before others lead you to a tragic internal defeat of self-value.

Much love,

Charrise Renee

Sunday, November 14, 2010

::Sweet Truth - Where Do Our Intentions Stand::

What are the root reasons why we deliberately do the things that we do? Sometimes truth is hard to find within the overall perspective... Or maybe it isn't.

Chrisette Michele does a great job of exemplifying her truth and making us see our own from time to time. Recently, she made a very poignant post on her blog regarding an incident at a recent award show where Rick Ross allegedly walked out of the show in response to losing an award.

"...I pray with every song I sing I'm singing from the bottom of my heart. If all we want is an award for telling our truths, then we really have no true reason. This isn’t a competition. This is a stage for self expression and I’m grateful for the opportunity to live on it. I’d sing even if nobody sang along...."

I question our generation's authenticity. Why do we portray ourselves in such ways that are inauthentic and un-genuine? Why do we thrive on ignorance and strive for recognition? Why is it that we cannot pursue our purpose; adding value to the world and lives of others? Is that not sufficient enough?

We have won before the race has even began. But I guess nowadays, the medal holds more importance than the actual race. The journey to get to the recognition. The lives that were touched along the way. Who we transitioned into because of that pursuit...

We lack values and morals... No code of ethics among ourselves. Our pursuits stem from selfish intentions. It ills me to say that I am a part of such a mass of people. I guess that's why I take it upon myself to be different. Not for the sake of the supposed "recognition" and "accolades".

There are too many instances where we as a generation judge others before judging ourselves.We take responsibility for nothing and take credit for everything. Glorifying THINGS and not being satisfied with self. We shine a light on the imperfections of others before turning the mirror on ourselves to view and correct our own faults. It seems as if we have some major generational insecurity issues, right? Another post, another day...


We are uniquely made with divine purpose. These "celebrities" are just regular people who are given a broader platform to display their purpose... If they so choose. Then there are others who use said platform for selfish, self glorifying reasons. Big, fat SMH to those of them that live with those, ahem, intentions.

"I make music for the hood. To tell the story of where we come from. My music is the definition of the struggle and the hustle. I do this for those that are mute and have no voice.."

Which really means:

"I make music to tell my own story so that I'll sell records and get a grammy. Then from there I'll get even more recognition and forget about my hood."

Right? Right.

But this is more than music. This is more than the entertainment industry. This is PEOPLE and INTENTIONS in the broadest sense of the subject at hand. Where do your intentions lie and what value are you adding to this world of infinite possibility and influence?

To put it bluntly, Get Ya Sh*t Together.

And that's said with much love, as always....

C. Renee

Chrisette Michele
Photo Credit: Dion Jefferies for
Immaculate Perception Photography
Taken at The Kristol Blake Salon & Spa
Chrisette Michele Meet & Greet

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

::Sweet Check-In - Continuing The #BeautifulCrusade::

When you let go of FEAR and fly on FAITH, good things happen in abundance!

I alomost let them get me... I almost let them keep me away from my greatness. What THEY say and what THEY think almost had a death grip hold on me and my success. But I had to make the decision to take full control and responsibility for my own success!

I am so happy to have a strong confidence in myself and my purpose. My God-given abilities are more than enough! This past month has been OUTSTANDING and I'm making strides in the pursuit of my goals. I aspire to inspire others to move mountains and do the same.

When we live in a world of contentment and comfortability, our vision gets blurred and mediocrity becomes the norm. It took me getting out of my comfort zone COMPLETELY to see the changes that I initially envisioned for myself.

Don't get me wrong, I have had my trials and I will continue to face and overcome adverse circumstances. That's all an integral part of this #BeautifulCrusade. Going into this, I knew it'd be a challenge but there is always a great outcome in the midst of unfavorable situations. I promise ;-D

Writing this at this moment, I'm putting some things in perspective and I'm so grateful for the way things have turned out thus far....

You know what... I'm going to fast. (Random! lol)

From right now up until the day before Thanksgiving (11/24/10) I'm going to fast from meat. I'm going to do fruits, vegetables and water up until then... Yea... That's what I'll do.

Sometimes we have to step back and re-dedicate ourselves to His will for us and grow closer in spirit. I have learned so much about myself thus far. I'm so excited and eager to see what comes next.

Don't be afraid to pursue your heart's desire. What THEY say has no affect on what YOU do. You are more than capable of doing any and everything. It takes the faith of a mustard seed and confidence in what you've been divinely given.

Don't let them take that away from you...

Much Love,
C. Renee

Sunday, November 7, 2010

::Sweet Friendships - Analyzing Relationships for the Sake of Sanity and Success::

What do our friendships say about who we are? Birds of a feather build nests of the same twigs, sticks and dirt together...

Looking on my current position, I'd say it's essential that I have a strong circle of friendship and support. And I will say that I have some great people backing me on my goals and dreams. They help me put things in perspective as well as keep me on my toes. These great people have gone above and beyond and I am very appreciative for their kindness in that aspect.

However, there are times when our ideals and personalities clash in ways that cannot be ignored. This is natural being that not everyone is the same. How do we preserve the core values of the friendship without letting opinions and personalties get in the way?

I've been tested a few times in the past couple weeks in situational friendships. Tested where I either don't have the same beliefs, values, or opinions as my counterparts. It gets frustrating when you're firmly committed to your goals and grounded in your ideals and, in turn, someone tries to force what they feel or believe on you. Friendships are supposed be built on a level of respect and cammraderie. What happens when those things fall apart or begin to shift?

In another aspect, I've been continually faced with the battle of being a friend to someone who isn't such a great friend to myself and others. Of course, in this light, the obvious answer would be to end the relationship correct? Or approach this situation in a non-confrontational manner. This tends to be hard when people have the tendency to be defensive or possess the inability to take constructive criticism well. It's like an inevitable tug-o-war of hearts, minds, and pride. No winner to be found amidst the three.

This all feels like I'm rambling and not making much sense... I may or may not be. Situations like these give me headaches. Mostly when I see things in mutliple friendships that I do not agree with. I do not like the person that I am becoming by choosing to continually associate with certain people and pursue friendships with empty meaning. I will say that in times like these, I tend to distance myself from everyone.

Especially now.

My goals take precedence and I'm committed to making things happen. A lot of people talk and plan about what they will do but never get around to action because the talking gets in the way.

Here is where I seperate the talkers from the doers.